Department of Homeland Security Appropriations Act, 2014 - Makes appropriations for the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) for FY2014.Title I: Departmental Management and Operations - Makes appropriations for: (1) the Office of the Secretary of Homeland Security and executive management, (2) the Office of the Under Secretary for Management, (3) the Office of the Chief Financial Officer, (4) the Office of the Chief Information Officer, (5) intelligence analysis and operations coordination activities, and (6) the Office of the Inspector General. Title II: Security, Enforcement, and Investigations - Makes appropriations for: (1) U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP), including for border security fencing, infrastructure, and technology; (2) U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), including to reimburse other federal agencies for the costs associated with the care, maintenance, and repatriation of smuggled aliens unlawfully present in the United States, to identify and remove from the United States aliens convicted of a crime once they are judged deportable, and for detention and removal operations; (3) the Transportation Security Administration (TSA), including for aviation security (including explosives detection systems), surface transportation security, the development and implementation of vetting and credentialing activities of the Office of Transportation Threat Assessment and Credentialing, transportation security support and intelligence, and the Federal Air Marshals; (4) the Coast Guard, including funding designated by the Congress for Overseas Contingency Operations/Global War on Terrorism, funding derived from the Oil Spill Liability Trust Fund for prevention, removal, and enforcement related to oil discharges, funding for environmental compliance and restoration functions, and funding for the Coast Guard Reserve; and (5) the U.S. Secret Service. Requires the Border Patrol to maintain an active duty presence of not less than 21,370 full-time equivalent agents protecting U.S. borders in FY2014. Prohibits the use of funds appropriated for border fencing for concurrent deployment of technology associated with integrated fixed towers until the Commissioner of CBP certifies that operational testing has been completed on the first deployment. Requires ICE funding to maintain a level of not less than 31,800 detention beds through September 30, 2014. Requires the TSA Administrator to submit a report, by December 31, 2013, that: (1) certifies that one in four air passengers that require security screening by TSA is eligible for expedited screening without lowering security standards; and (2) outlines a strategy to increase the number of air passengers eligible for expedited screening to 50% by the end of calendar year 2014. Title III: Protection, Preparedness, Response, and Recovery - Makes appropriations for FY2014 for: (1) the Office of the Under Secretary for the National Protection and Programs Directorate, including for the Federal Protective Service (FPS) and the Office of Biometric Identity Management; (2) the Office of Health Affairs, including for BioWatch operations; and (3) the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA), including for grants for state and local programs (including the Urban Area Security Initiative), firefighter assistance grants, emergency management performance grants, the U.S. Fire Administration, disaster relief, the flood hazard mapping and risk analysis program, the National Flood Insurance Fund, the predisaster mitigation grant program, and the emergency food and shelter program. Requires the revenues and collections of security fees credited to the account of FPS to be available until expended for necessary expenses related to the protection of federally owned and leased buildings and for the operations of FPS, provided that the Secretary of DHS and the Director of the Office of Management and Budget (OMB) shall certify by December 31, 2013, that FPS operations will be fully funded in FY2014 through revenues and collection of security fees and shall adjust the fees to ensure fee collections are sufficient to ensure that FPS maintains not fewer than 1,371 full-time equivalent staff and 1,007 full-time equivalent Police Officers, Inspectors, Area Commanders, and Special Agents who, while working, are directly engaged on a daily basis protecting and enforcing laws at federal buildings. Requires the Director of FPS to include with the submission of the President's FY2015 budget a strategic human capital plan that aligns fee collections to personnel requirements based on a current threat assessment. Title IV: Research and Development, Training, and Services - Makes appropriations for FY2014 for: (1) U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services (CIS), including for the E-Verify program; (2) the Federal Law Enforcement Training Center; (3) the Office of the Under Secretary for Science and Technology; and (4) the Domestic Nuclear Detection Office. Prohibits the use of funds made available in this Act for grants for immigrant integration to provide services to aliens who have not been lawfully admitted for permanent residence. Title V: General Provisions - (Sec. 501) Sets forth limitations and prohibitions on the availability, use, reprogramming, or transfer of funds for specified programs and activities under this Act. (Sec. 513) Prohibits the use of funds available in this Act to amend the oath of allegiance required under the Immigration and Nationality Act (INA). (Sec. 523) Prohibits the use of funds by CIS to grant an immigration benefit unless the results of required background checks have been received and do not preclude granting the benefit. (Sec. 526) Prohibits the use of funds provided in this or any other Act to approve a waiver of the navigation and vessel-inspection laws for the transportation of crude oil distributed from the Strategic Petroleum Reserve until the Secretary of DHS takes adequate measures to ensure the use of U.S. flag vessels. (Sec. 527) Prohibits the use of funds in this Act to reduce the Coast Guard's Operations Systems Center mission or its government-employed or contract staff levels. (Sec. 528) Prohibits the use of funds for CBP to prevent an individual from importing a prescription drug from Canada if: (1) such individual is not in the business of importing a prescription drug; and (2) such drug complies with specified provisions of the Federal Food, Drug, and Cosmetic Act and is not a controlled substance or a biological product. Makes this section applicable only to individuals transporting on their person a personal-use quantity of the prescription drug, not exceeding a 90-day supply. (Sec. 531) Prohibits the use of funds made available in this Act: (1) for planning, testing, piloting, or developing a national identification card; (2) to transfer, release, or assist in the transfer or release to or within the United States, its territories, or possessions, of Khalid Sheikh Mohammed or any other detainee who is not a U.S. citizen or a member of the U.S. Armed Forces, or who is or was held on or after June 24, 2009, at the U.S. Naval Station, Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, by the Department of Defense (DOD); or (3) to employ unauthorized aliens. (Sec. 539) Requires any company that collects or retains personal information directly from any individual who participates in TSA's Registered Traveler or successor program to safeguard and dispose of such information in accordance with specified requirements. (Sec. 541) Requires the TSA Administrator to: (1) submit to the House and Senate Appropriations Committees a report that either certifies that the requirement for screening all air cargo on passenger aircraft by the deadline has been met or includes a strategy to comply with such requirements, and (2) continue to submit such reports every 180 days until the Administrator has achieved screening of 100% of such air cargo. (Sec. 550) Prohibits funds made available under this Act or any prior appropriations Act from being provided to the Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now (ACORN) or any of its affiliates, subsidiaries, or allied organizations. (Sec. 552) Requires the DHS Secretary to ensure enforcement of immigration laws. (Sec. 556) Prohibits funds made available under this Act from being used by a federal law enforcement officer to facilitate the transfer of an operable firearm to an individual if the officer knows or suspects that the individual is an agent of a drug cartel unless U.S. law enforcement personnel continuously monitor or control the firearm at all times. (Sec. 559) Prohibits the use of funds under this Act to pay for the travel to or attendance of more than 50 employees of a single component of DHS, who are stationed in the United States, at a single international conference unless the Deputy Secretary determines that such attendance is in the national interest and notifies the Senate and House Appropriations Committees within at least 10 days of that determination and its basis. (Sec. 560) Directs the Secretary to submit an annual report to the Inspector General regarding the costs and contracting procedures related to each conference held by any departmental component, agency, board, commission, or office during FY2014 for which the cost to the U.S. government was more than $100,000. Requires the head of any departmental component, agency, board, commission, or office, within 15 days after holding a conference during FY2014 for which the cost to the U.S. government was more than $20,000, to notify the Inspector General of the date, location, and number of employees attending such conference. (Sec. 561) Prohibits the use of funds to administer or enforce provisions regarding adjusted premium rates under the National Flood Insurance Act of 1968. (Sec. 562) Directs the FEMA Administrator, in administering the funds made available to address any major disaster declared on or after August 27, 2011, to establish a pilot program for the relocation of state facilities under the Robert T. Stafford Disaster Relief and Emergency Assistance Act. (Sec. 565) Amends: (1) the Department of Justice Appropriations Act of 2002 to increase from $7 to $9 the fee charged by the Attorney General for the immigration inspection of each passenger arriving at a U.S. port of entry, or for the preinspection of a passenger in a place outside of the United States prior to such arrival, aboard a commercial aircraft or commercial vessel; and (2) the Consolidated Appropriations Resolution, 2003 to increase from $3 to $5 the amount charged by the Attorney General per individual for the immigration inspection or pre-inspection of each commercial vessel passenger, with an exception for designated ports of entry passengers arriving by ferry or by Great Lakes and connecting waterways when operating on a regular schedule. (Sec. 566) Authorizes the Secretary to accept donations of real and personal property (including monetary donations) and nonpersonal services from private parties and state and local governments for purposes of constructing, altering, operating, or maintaining a new or existing land port of entry facility. (Sec. 567) Prohibits the Secretary from: (1) imposing any new border crossing fee on individuals crossing the southern U.S. border or the northern border at a land port of entry, or (2) conducting any study relating to the imposition of a border crossing fee. (Sec. 568) Revises the visa waiver program under the INA to authorize the Secretary (in lieu of the Attorney General) to designate any country as a program country if such country provides machine-readable passports and the visa refusal rate and overstay rate for nationals of that country were both not more than 3% in the previous fiscal year. Revises probationary and termination provisions. Provides for the consultative role of the Secretary of State. Directs the Comptroller General (GAO) to conduct a review of the methods used by the Secretary to: (1) track aliens entering and exiting the United States, and (2) detect any such alien who stays longer than such alien's period of authorized admission. Directs the Secretary to submit: (1) an evaluation of the security risks of aliens who enter the United States without an approved Electronic System for Travel Authorization verification, and (2) a description of any improvements needed to minimize the number of aliens who enter the United States without such verification. Expresses the sense of Congress that the Secretary, in the process of conducting evaluations of countries participating in the visa waiver program, to prioritize the reviews of countries in which circumstances indicate that such a review is necessary or desirable. (Sec. 570) Rescinds specified funds for: (1) the Coast Guard for acquisition, construction, and improvements; (2) TSA for aviation security and research and development; and (3) CBP unobligated prior year balances for border security, fencing, infrastructure, and technology. (Sec. 571) Rescinds specified amounts of funds transferred to DHS when it was created in 2003 for: (1) CBP for salaries and expenses; (2) ICE for a Violent Crime Reduction Program; (3) TSA; (4) the Coast Guard for acquisition, construction, and improvements; (5) FEMA for the Office of Domestic Preparedness and the National Predisaster Mitigation Fund; and (6) the Working Capital Fund. (Sec. 572) Rescinds specified funds from unobligated balances made available in the Department of the Treasury Forfeiture Fund.